Getting Grumpy with 3D

POSTED BY Global Administrator
I’m getting too old for all this.

You see, all the talk in the industry (or, at least, a goodly part of it) is of how 2011 is going to be the year of 3D in mobile; the year in which autostereoscopic handsets (such as the Sharp Galapogos range just hitting the Japanese market) are going to spread rapidly across the globe, and if the next reimagining of the iPhone doesn’t feature a 3D system, well, I’m a banana.

Now, I don’t disagree in the slightest with these myriad predictions, or in the fact that the industry appears to be moving full steam ahead in its attempts to make those predictions a reality. It’s just that: I don’t get it.

Let me be clear about this. It’s not that I simply stare with complete lack of comprehension at senior mobile executives as they expound their plans for 3D domination. It’s that, well, I don’t really get the 3D thing at all.

I don’t get why we suddenly have to have virtual swords leaping out of cinema screens, or why we need to have rugby players hurtling down a touchline which has extended into our living rooms. When offered the choice between a 2D or a 3D film, I usually opt for the former.

Look, I can sense you saying, the world has moved on since you were a teenager and you would occasionally dabble with 3D courtesy of tatty cardboard polarised glasses, only to experience of profound sense of disappointment and disillusionment. (And no, you cheeky monkeys, we’re not talking the 1950s and House of Wax here, it’s the abortive 80s revival that I caught.) It’s no longer a world of blurry reds and blues. You don’t need tatty cardboard glasses. In fact, you rarely need the glasses at all.

Well, I appreciate your concern, but – on a personal  level – remain unconvinced and unconverted. I don’t get 3D in much the same way as I don’t get Kindles: I like to do my leisure reading in paper format, I like the look of books on bookshelves. So there.

The thought strikes me therefore that I may be turning into Grumpy Old Analyst, who rails against the zeitgeist and is occasionally dredged up by an industry magazine to complain bitterly that it’s all gone wrong since they introduced QWERTY keyboards on mobile.

But there may be hope for me. I have made the painful transition from keypad to touchscreen handset, and one that has an accessible app store at its disposal. There may well be a correlation between the latter and the fact that I am now downloading far more apps than was previously the case. I am now addicted to Asphalt 5, and have unlocked 15 vehicles (my current weapon of choice being a Ford Mustang GT500), 4 cities and, er, two girls.

That said, Asphalt 5 will have competition for my leisure time over the Christmas break, in the form of a brace of political biographies.

That’s right. Books. Between Hard Covers. Typed On Paper. In 2D.